New Year, New You?

Jan 19

YOLO

Every year as the sun sets on the holiday season, no matter how indulgent it was, or was not, we cross the threshold into a new calendar year with that nagging feeling that it’s time to make changes. My resolutions usually begin with taking a break from alcohol as my default practice of abstaining throughout the work week slips into complacency when holiday parties disrupt the normal ebb and flow of social obligations and bleed into every day of the week spanning an entire month. Even though my dietary habits and exercise routines don’t waver much from November to January, I am always guilty of succumbing to that You Only Live Once mentality, and inevitably let my guard down and dabble in choices I would never consider if the calendar indicated anything other than December. And then I spend January trying to pull it all back and berating myself about it.

But this year was different.

Life is Box of Chocolates

Through my own fault and inability to slow down and manage a boatload of additional stress last year, I ended up with a slipped disc in my cervical spine in mid-November with associated nerve pain shooting down my arm that was severe enough to send me to the emergency room and required almost eight weeks of rest and rehabilitation to get back to my fitness routine. If those four weeks weren’t enough of a setback, after reluctantly pushing myself to go out on New Year’s Eve because, YOLO, I was rewarded with the worst upper respiratory infection that I have ever had in my life. The nasty virus (thankfully not Covid) completely highjacked my head and ears with overwhelming congestion right at the onset of my New Year, New You commitments. I’ll admit I was forlorn, completely defeated to be sidelined once again so soon after getting my mojo back. Sadly for me, this year’s holiday season was sandwiched between personal setbacks and there was little left to do but accept my circumstances and rest, at times barely leaving my bedroom.

This unfortunate string of bad luck got me thinking about how the importance of mental health.

Healthy in Mind & Body

Without a positive mindset, does anything else really matter? And while I can argue that consistency in healthy lifestyle behaviors is the key to manifest a healthy mind as well as a healthy body, sometimes we have no choice but to answer the call to slow down and rest. And when unforeseen things happen, don’t go down the rabbit hole of beating ourselves up just because we have stumbled off course without the anchor of our healthy habits and routines.

Smack dab in the middle of my personal mellow drama this holiday season, news that Stephen “Twitch” Boss, a dancer and celebrity that exuded nothing but joy and the outward expression of success, took his own life on December 13th, 2022. To understand why this affected me so profoundly, one can look no further than the reaction from fans all around the country and world over, namely, the confusion it caused of how someone who’s life seemed blissful and rosey from the outside could be suffering so much inside, eventually taking his own life in the manner that he did. As a lifelong dancer, I was an early fan of the television program, So You Think You Could Dance, and was introduced to Twitch on Season 4 when he absolutely blew my mind with his natural abilities and gift for what appeared to be the entire spectrum of dance genres. Since then, I regularly followed him and his wife on social media because their feeds offered the kind of levity and escapism that I desire from social media, without the dark, toxic hateful and misinformation side of it. The couple appeared so in love, sharing a deep appreciation for the way that dance connects all of us to the source, the life force. Like the rest of his fans, I was in shock and in pain, which sounds so weird because I didn’t even know the man. It took weeks for me to process the news and I can only imagine what it is like for those who knew and loved him. For me, it brought up feelings of skepticism and doubt over my own need to measure up to my lofty expectations of how life should be, and how I revolve in it. I was reminded to never judge a book by its cover but most importantly, that mental health is priority numero uno because without that, there is no flow state, no forward mobility, no goal worth achieving. This crisis of mental illness is ubiquitous and is a reminder that everyone you meet is likely fighting a battle of their own that you would never know about and possibly, never understand. So please, let’s always, always, be kind. And that also means being kind to ourselves when life throws us another curveball.

The Power in Being

Through this tragic event, along with having to adjust to life without the healthy outlets that keep me grounded every day, it got me thinking about the pressure, be it societal or self-imposed, that we may make changes at the beginning of every year. Maybe we don’t need to try to reinvent ourselves every year. Perhaps we don’t need to keep pushing towards some unrealistic version of ourselves, the version that we might potentially become one day - one that is ten pounds lighter, that that defies our age, and gives us that elusive competitive edge in the world. Maybe we need to find peace and contentment in just BEING - being here. Being alive. To accept ourselves, our attributes, and our flaws, and just keep moving forward. Let’s accept that there will be inevitable setbacks, we will fall off course, whether it be holiday indulgence, an injury, or another life altering event. Because the only thing that matters is how we respond when things don’t go as we plan. The important part is jumping back in and showing up. Consistently. Even when it’s hard and we feel like we’re behind the eight ball. The best thing we can do is to keep at it and build upon a solid foundation. Maybe then, we can start the new year with a simple appreciation for being, a brand-new opportunity to live, to build on on our successes of the previous year, breathe the air, hug a friend, and experience life for all its vast beauty and abundance.

So, this year, no more new year, new you. It’s the same wonderful you. The one that keeps showing up after getting knocked down. Again, and again.

Meg Adelman